The dark, anarchic and implausible humorous novel takes place in a public school in a poor area of Bristol. Caleb Duck, fueled by alcohol and drug fantasies, begins a solitary crusade to break the cycle of deprivation in which the students of his comprehensive education department suffer. He fights to raise standards in education, table tennis, spelling and numeracy, defending their right to determine their own destiny. Caleb hates the combined forces of the educational establishment and the national curriculum. He leaves behind a trail of destruction of people, students and property in an attempt to assert the superiority of old-fashioned values and repay municipal taxpayers for their costs.